the ramblings of an insane man (THATS ME!!!!)
i will share things throughout my days of inhaling air and drinking various fluids (◠‿◠✿)

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about me(▰˘◡˘▰)

my name is cali
im a boy who is very hungry right now and could really go for an egg
oh oh sorry... but yes
im a big fan of anime, video games, music, and art. ... my back is hurting
i hope you enjoy my insanity (im behind you right now)



im writing from work again! hehehe...
im a very busy guy, so it makes sense.
most of my entries are done earlier in the morning, actually.
but anyways!

today was off to a hard start, i had a big freak out.
wait a second, some customers just waked inside...

ok theyre gone now LOL.
im doing work while at work. what a world...


hi everyone! im sorry, i know its been a while.
ive been so busy, and honestly really sad too
things have just been really tough for me
but i'll make it through! i can do it,
ive just got to keep fighting hard.
i hope i can stay home from my one job today,
ive been working so much, its really exhausting
dealing with people like i must.
i actually yelled at a customer the other day,
they whistled to me to get my attention
im no dog... so i yelled!
it felt nice, but my coworkers said i should have
not served them at all, hahahaha

its raining right now, i love the rain.
may it rain some more, but hope i feel happier.


im typing this during a morning shift at work! LOL
i have to keep checking over my shoulder at the cameras
to make sure nobody sneaks in and grows mad while im busy...
i have so much to do, i cant even relax during work down time!
its stressful (wow, i wrote that while looking away at a camera...)
anyways, ive been listening to a lot of vocaloid recently.
my favorite was always kaito, but kiyoteru has really climbed the ranks
hes a sexy nerd with glasses who smokes... can you blame me?
maybe ill update more through my shift, but right now im sweating!
hahaha, happy birthday to my friend today as well!
ive baked him a cake with chocolate frosting and sprinkles.

happy april!

as soon as i finished, the printer jammed and i had to fix it... what a start.


it turns out i wasnt recovered, as ive gotten sick again.
i worked for the weekend, but monday morning i got sick again.
its really stressful! im so far behind.
i was sick for almost a full week, after all.
actually, its really taking its toll on me.
i was so stressed over getting sick, i think it made me sick again actually.
i felt fine before...
augh.. wish me luck, please.

either way, ive got a lot to do today.
i have to bake a cake as well, actually.
i hope ill be okay in the end.


ok, i should have recovered from my illness now
it only took me like five days and no working...

the good thing is i was paid today, and it was actually more than expected!
that being said i also work tonight for a while.
somehow i only got one hour of sleep...
ill try my best to wake up haha
my friend has lended me a book,
which i am super excited to further read!
it's a horror novel titled "things have gotten worse since we last spoke"
(i think)
im very interested, and i do love my horror
ive had many ideas with horror actually
i wish i had the time to sit down and draw
but alas, time is not something i have much of... o(╥﹏╥)o
i always hate being sick - because i just sit there!
i cant do anything, but i have so much to do
now im even more behind!

i relate to ignatz's panics...
i cant stand being late, i get flustered


wow it has been a minute!
im sorry for that silence, everyone!
i got the stomach flu, i think
ive been in bed for days now, which has sucked
missing work always makes me nervous
im feeling less sad, at least
hopefully my silence wasnt worrying!
i usually write my entries early in the morning, but ive been so sick

however, ive been able to at least watch some of my dvds while home
i bought ghost stories (the dub haha) and it is SO FUNNY!
i love the art, i love the music, and the jokes are just so funny!
because i love nerds, i honestly love leo.

hes so cute! and theyre fuckin so funny lolll
its been the humor i needed through this sickness...

i'll post more, ok? thank you for reading, everyone!


im not doing much better. its hard to get motivated to move
i think ive been getting worse, actually
i had to call out of work twice - i just couldnt do it
i dont know if it was weak of me to do.
ive just been so depressed, i dont know,
my paycheck is already suffering for it.
im trying my best, i really am
today ive fallen asleep at my desk many times, even standing up
i think its ruined my makeup too.
im sorry to everyone


i am so very stressed out, i dont know what to do...
i was paid today, but it was less than i expected.
ive overspent, im so nervous. my god
there is so much to do and get done,
can i really do it? i dont know...
i am working nonstop into next week, where i will work again.
but when will i being my personal work?
im so tired...
so very very tired.....
gas prices are so high, and ill need to get gas soon
what can i afford? i dont know anymore.
ive yet to fulfill my promises to my friends
i feel so awful, out of stress and guilt.
i wish i had the time, but i need the money.

no matter what, i'll stay sad and exhausted, i think.


today i am going to bake ignatz's cake with my boyfriend♡
his birthday is approaching on monday, and i will be celebrating with a party.
his cake is going to be a poundcake with fruits and whipped cream!
ive overspent my paycheck, though... im very nervous. i dont know what i will do
aside from that, my boyfriend and i will be watching
while it bakes (lol)
i dont think the movie will be great, but thats not what matters
i just want it to have good gore scenes, thats what i care about!
speaking of gore...
i remember a while ago watching elfen lied, and being very confused.
i wonder if i should watch it again? do i even have time?
its only so long before im worked to death...


every day i thank god for my dvd player.

i picked these up yestrday evening, which im super happy about!
i love how cheap everything ends up - just bcuz people prefer streaming services!
i also got season 3 of family guy, season 12 of south park...
im so happy for what ive found. some of these are actually new to me...
the slaughterhouse massacre just called out to me, lol
i used to be obsessed with gore films, so i felt compelled to buy it (besides, it was only $2)
the place i went to had lots of vintage manga and dvds, but this one most interested me
im still thinking to save up and buy gintama on dvd too, but its a bit expensive!
either way, im happy for what ive purchased. i think we should return to the days of box tvs and dvd players... sigh


finally, ive redyed my hair!

my hair had been green and pink for so long, but it is now purple and blue instead!
im not used to it. when i look at my reflection, i go "who is he!?"
i think my rats are confused too!
i had sunday off of work for the first time in a while,
and i spent it all watching south park...
well, thats not true. i had many responsibilities.
week after week i have so much to do, i want to sleep for a long time.
oh well, i'll give my best for the people i know.
but between you and me, i prefer to just watch south park all day!


whew... i hope everyone had a nice weekend! my god am i tired...
work has been CRAZY !!! i hate retail so much...
i have so much to get done, but not enough time
maybe if i stop sleeping... i have many waiting for their artwork.
my, i need a nap...

recently ive been thinking a lot about gintama again.
gintama was one of my first anime (the first being baka and test - crazy specific, right?)
but whenever i watched it, i was in love with shinpachi!
who knew that love for meganes and their dorkiness would last so long?
but anyways, dorky boys are the cutest.
when i begain rewatching after many years (im gonna be finishing it soon!) i realized...
hey, shinpachi is like if timeskip ignatz was constantly angry!
haha, im kidding - they're really quite different, atually.
still, shinpachi is adorable♡


they've been scheduling me like crazy at work! it's a bit exhausting...
i have a lot to do for my communities, and my home is so dirty.
on news for this site, im planning on some new pages...
namely i'd kinda maybe want to add an igraph section.... hehe ★~(◡﹏◕✿)
raphael is my second favorite (cyril is my third), but idk if hed get his own page.
regardless, ignatz x raphael is very dear to me and i love to show it off

plus, i have lots of art of it i can show you all!

ill try and add this before ANOTHER seven hour shift today, ughhh...
work is so tiring, i want to spend all day drawing and coding

im also currently adding a guestbook! i hope to see those who frequent my site, as there will be many updates (i pinky promise)


ive continued to work very hard on this site.
i hope people see it, and i hope people enjoy it!
yesterday i spent some time with my boyfriend.
we watched many weird videos (i love finding them)
and some scary fan games... ooohh!
what was even scarier was that we
discovered an old creation of mine on SCRATCH!!!!
it was kind of funny though...
ive lacked time to draw, but i have many ideas to give ignatz.
my, i can draw him from memory alone!
but it is so fun to give him outfits.

if you are reading here, thank you!
i'll continue to work hard on my site!


today i watched videos on youtube from user takena.
they were so amazing!
ive always been a big fan of weird horror, so i loved it all very much.
my personal favorite was


when i watch scary things like this, it always fills me with interest.
ive been very into fire emblem and its characters for a while,
and sadly theyve fallen victim to my love of horror!
its just so fun to do a genre crossover.
so if you see my sketchbook mighttt have some drawings
of lysithea cutting ignatz open.
hahaha, im kidding im kidding!
yes, hahaha... im kidding, totally and surely. cough cough